tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-311806932024-03-16T08:33:00.946-07:00Consider Your Ass Kicked!This blog is intended as a real-time updated archive in a keyword-searchable database for the discriminating news enthusiast.dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.comBlogger4465125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-24963515124293465682024-03-16T08:07:00.000-07:002024-03-16T08:07:43.211-07:00My brother is notI am the bad actor malefactor please, you musician fans get yisself down off yo're dumb ass pederastals and come in. Code in Velitas This Is SQUARE BARE> UNCODE or no code atall, yallers. The business haas never left the bill, and my hat is in sesh with my 2 main cahoots. Stephi and KA RIST EE LEIGH O'TANEX THE COLLE'ENdogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-46205215040556831532024-03-16T07:52:00.000-07:002024-03-16T07:52:51.199-07:00Random verbatim comment screenshot #2: dedicated to the Crap Blog Detective, who fellates secretly I hopeIt is still a crime, Over There. Take it from Mr. Doughbags hisself: the South Yank Greek Irish One(1)STARdogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-88669511307556119812024-03-16T07:44:00.000-07:002024-03-16T07:44:24.269-07:00CYAK RIPPED FROM THE HEADLIES #1: Oh, Shit. LOL, I thought it said "Every Actor Has Played A Major Batman Character"That chick in the neon nukey phlegm top makes me want to puke solar panels at North Jersey, to be sincere somehow. As usual, "the blonde"These advertisers make me want to go in covert Fung Shway Interior Antidecor Specialist on their A.I. disabled HOLMES, soda speak. When o when will Data put on SPOCK EARS and show up at the dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-79051453818370897952024-03-08T21:29:00.000-08:002024-03-08T21:31:02.181-08:00A Plea For Unity Originating From Trisol"Soliens" is I think what all natives of this star system - from lowliest bacterium to highest dolphin or ape (such as us) (beings with third-class minds), and even including what used to be called "contagious living fluids" (viruses, might as well throw in PRIONS) ought to be called. We would be Trisoliens. Natives of Trisol. Well why not?BIG NOTE: "third-class minds" not really important dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-20885957060530192002024-02-26T05:26:00.000-08:002024-02-26T05:26:05.575-08:00STRIVES WITH G*D FOR SUBMISSION TO G*DLet's be respectful. This is a cause whose time IS COME. #GOFUNDWE! MAKE YOUR 1-TIME $2 PLEDGE IN COMMENTS All non-pledge comments shall be removed first. ISRAEL: STROVE WITH G*D ISLAM: SUBMISSION TO G*D'S WILL. Why o why not...? Include your specific Go Fund Me LINK with your pledge comment! ALL LINKS MUST INCLUDE "ISRAEL FOR ISLAM" or "OBSERVANT JEWS FOR DEVOTED dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-33126847705718138292023-11-19T09:17:00.000-08:002023-11-19T09:17:31.792-08:00New Poems Up on My Sister Blog, APOCKETFULOFPOESY dot com! Please feel free to come by, click and read, and submit your critiques in comments. SUPPORT THE DRIVE FOR 365 on this, the FOURTEENTH ANNIVERSARY of the institution of the "poem-a-day(-on-average)" requirement! Picture credit: some lucky fan who prefers (or might well prefer) to remain anonymous. CUTIE dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-81812173130474855692023-11-19T08:31:00.000-08:002023-11-19T08:31:55.747-08:00"The X-Men's Enemies Are Turning Cyclops Into A Martyr (again)"Look. If the thing doesn't work the first five times it's tried, it could be time to admit the one you're setting up as a martyr has no real fans who'd mourn its (pardon me: ITS) passing. Cyclops? His superpower is to SEE RED at you, destroying all in line with his big bad male gaze. If ever there was a way-too-hetero mutant on overcompensation mode (and therefore, pretty unfit for the dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-36797541276769350742023-11-19T05:25:00.000-08:002023-11-19T05:25:32.071-08:00"10 Tells Why First-to-Third Week Huge Box Office Fail of MCU's Marvels Points Way To Future CGI and Continuity Problems"Ok. OK, you can stop reading. I made that up. If you see that particular funny clickbait headline, by all means drop an unverifiable anecdote in comments and I'll unsource the scoundrels responsible for stealing my shtick.This has been yet another iteration of Clickbait Headlines Critiques, right here on Consider Your Ass Kicked! dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-71399622898178470092023-11-18T10:51:00.000-08:002023-11-18T10:52:33.078-08:00Big Promises (canceled - moved over to original poetry blog)dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-23059437202142308982023-11-18T10:20:00.000-08:002023-11-18T10:20:50.399-08:00"Marvel Heroes Like Daredevil & The Defenders Could Solve CGI Problems" I don't want to drop a huge log in anyone's victory float, but for far too long we've been turning to the wrong heroes to solve CGI problems. I say it's time to bring the IT Crowd in on this. See what they have to recommend. dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-90793218059458999412023-11-18T02:49:00.000-08:002023-11-18T03:37:27.177-08:00Fiction Friday Exclusive Preview: The Lay Of You-Know-Who, Book Twelve. Wheeling in his seat, he spat accusation across the room with his eyes. Valoutta of the Souls spun and caught it by her open mouth, teeth bared in an alarming display of manners. “WHAT??” she queried. “Nothing!” he added, more or less sheepishly. “It’s only that I ordered pot-stickers,” he unwisely clarified, receiving for his troubled sins a hard BOTTLE-SHOT CHAMPAGNE CROTCH SPIKE right in the dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-7744436840065163162023-11-17T10:12:00.000-08:002023-11-18T03:45:42.935-08:00"Spider-Man comic book writer is confused by his villain's appearance in the Madame Web Trailer"You and me both, Bill Strykszwinksy! Straczynski, that is. "J. Michael Straczynski."I mean, the trailer itself was pure class, what with that seeming psychic paramedic pulling a wrenching web-yank on spider-futures, pasts, you name it - from all we can see, right in the nick of time, too! She's been a paramedic in other things, I believe? That U.K. show? Isn't this the same actress?IMDB it later,dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-7388928155410222492023-11-17T09:24:00.000-08:002023-12-11T05:49:46.898-08:00TOUGH TOPICS #3: Heteronormative Threesome Etiquette: the BasicsWell, like, aren't you afraid to accidentally send yourself sexual vibes, though? So you just don't want other men to think you're gay? I'm not afraid to send myself sexual vibes. In fact, all heterosexual men who do their part must be at least part gay, because (SPOILER warning, GROSS): that's a man's hand, baby. When they're, you know, manually throttling their "joy stick," trust me: no amount dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-31848494866014990582023-11-17T08:38:00.000-08:002023-11-17T08:38:30.837-08:00People Aren't Toxic. You're Allergic, or Else Maybe They Just Taste Awful.It's like this: people aren't toxic. Some of them just taste bad.
If you hate lima beans, it's not the fact they are poisonous that makes them utterly not worth your time. They're not poisonous. But they're still utterly not worth your time: because they are not to your taste. You have every right to avoid them. You cannot possibly enjoy them. They're positively awful.
There are people like dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-14012912600249362372023-11-17T08:19:00.000-08:002023-11-17T08:19:55.555-08:00Thought of the day: BAD BOUNCE"It went over like a trampoline." dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-54093110134682591082023-11-17T08:18:00.000-08:002023-11-17T08:18:29.773-08:00What is the best Space on Q**** to submit Proofs from N*** Basement Hookup?Q. What is the best Space on Q & A site to submit Proofs from N*** Basement Hookup?A. Please don’t. At best you’re courting an adult filth tag (sounds like), at worst a much worse criminal charge for violating a basement. Are you at least fourteen? DON’T, then. It's against policy for fourteen year-olds even to be there! Check your local jurisdictions precedents and courts, please.dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-85136300468537449032023-11-17T05:44:00.000-08:002023-11-17T05:44:26.026-08:00"Power Rangers Red Ranger Just Became One of the Franchise's Strongest Characters!"What are these, strike headlines? Some recognition of how strong a character he has or was is I'm sure, on-point, but at the same point: who cares how scarlet, carmine or rose-tinted the spectacles are on a washed-out, washed-up, tarted-up false kung fu joint like this? Kudos, Red Ranger. That and the price of coffee will get you a tip, that is if you're as fast and accurate a baristor as I dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-80682025955077054382023-11-15T11:32:00.000-08:002023-11-15T11:32:14.192-08:00Fiction Friday Redux #9: "Copperlocks & The Three Panties"Consider Your Ass Kicked!: Fiction Friday: Copperlocks And The Three Panties (asurfaceofinfiniteshallowness.blogspot.com)dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-90856044839269230322023-11-15T11:21:00.000-08:002023-11-15T11:21:10.206-08:00"Most Annoying Songs Of All Time, Ranked"This is another edition of "Funny Clickbait Headlines Critiqued," right here on Consider Your Ass Kicked! 5. "Free Bird." This is the song I hack out on guitar if people are requesting cover tunes. See, I can't hack cover tunes, so I wrote a song called "Free Bird." It's like, "Went into the pet shop, boy, laid my heart on loan. Walked out with parakeet," something something. It's a buy one dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-57029711291800278142023-11-15T09:02:00.000-08:002023-11-15T09:05:01.728-08:00some self-regardYour humble online poet's verse inspires an attack or curse. Now please, who's fault has all this been? Check in the mirror, mannequin.dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-82027287836208772682023-11-15T05:49:00.000-08:002023-11-15T05:50:43.037-08:00"Wonder Man Proved To Be Stronger Than All The Avengers Combined"No sh!t. He's Wonder Man. From Avengers #9 by Stan Lee & Don Heck. What do you expect when Wonder Man makes the scene? He's like Superman except from prison, and he can't fly without the aid of his jet - jet-belt, in his case. Not invisible Jet, such as the Amazonians were wont to invent, design, test-execute and mass-produce for only the use of their ace diplomat to Man's World, Wonder dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-62397256757490528752023-11-14T22:00:00.000-08:002023-11-14T22:00:33.829-08:00"Along with being the Avengers’ villain-of-the-week in this issue, Namor was also responsible for finding Captain America frozen in ice, and was directly responsible for Steve Rogers joining the Avengers."In a departure from our "Funny Clickbait Headlines Critique" feature here on Consider Your Ass Kicked!, the above is no headline. It's actually a snatch from one of the articles! I accidentally clicked through to the article. Not bad. I sure didn't know all THAT about Namor. Who knew? This all occurred in Avengers #4, mighty readers. Excelsior. dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-80278606617581589522023-11-13T16:20:00.000-08:002023-11-13T16:20:25.828-08:00CYAK! Redux: Han Solo, Master Linguist Part. 1Consider Your Ass Kicked!: How Many Languages Does Han Solo Speak, Anyway? (asurfaceofinfiniteshallowness.blogspot.com)dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-87205354566354510822023-11-13T16:02:00.000-08:002023-11-13T16:02:17.523-08:00"Disney has over 40 movies coming to theaters through 2031 - here they are." FALSE. This has been another specimen of "Funny Clickbait Headlines Critiques," here on Consider Your Ass Kicked! True story! dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31180693.post-68166315802172192372023-11-13T14:59:00.000-08:002023-11-13T14:59:54.409-08:00"15 Things You Never Knew Juggernaut Can Do"Pretty sure it's more like fifty. Oh, okay, okay, fifty minus about two-and-a-half. The guy is stronger than a resting Hulk and cannot be stopped once he's got forward progress. Everything else is up to the refs on the field and the review booth:That'd be the writers and the editors, kids. Play safe. dogimohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.com0