Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Monday, January 22, 2007

Mad Mathematician: Progress Update on My Research Lately

I've semi-proved the existence of God using binomial probability theory and a spool of quantum superstring. The problem is, I'm not sure I should go the rest of the way through the proof. I've got it to the point where I can demonstrate irrefutably that God is in a quantum state of existing and not-existing at the same time. It has been theorized, by me, that this unique mode of being is in fact the key to God's godlike powers.

But that sort of empty rationalization can't satisfy. The question still remains to be answered, one way or the other! Does God exist or not? How can I get God to resolve into one definite state? And from an experimental standpoint - is it worth the risk?

Here's what I mean by "risk." Suppose that God does exist, and is capable of all sorts of good things, potentially. If the outcome of my quantum experiment is that God collapses into a single state, and that state is non-existence, then all of the true believers out there are going to be pretty pissed at me for doing that. I mean, the possibility alone - of me being responsible for something like that - the mind balks. I don't want to be the bringer of that about!

But suppose that, speaking in a general way, God does NOT exist. And then, through my meddling in quantum peculiarities and stuff, suddenly God DOES. Definitely does. What would God be likely to do in such a situation? Is God, in all God's newborn glory and awesomeness, going to be grateful to me for giving God a hand up like that? Maybe. But I think God would be more likely to look at me as a threat. In such a situation. I know I would.

And there's a more troubling, third possibility. There always is. I'm not sure what it is exactly, but there is always a more troubling, third possibility.

Bottom line: I think that I'd better leave well enough the hell alone on this one from here on out. I've done some pretty damn mind-provoking groundwork, but I've taken it as far as I'm willing to take it. Let braver paramathematicians than I solve that final equation.

Next up for me: I do believe it's time I looked into this whole business of pi r squared. Can it really be as simple as all that? Surprise! I have the beginnings of a notion that it might well not be!

Stay tuned as we upend the universe from our armchairs.

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