There really is something special about McDonald's breakfast. But you have to make sure you get there early enough! If you show up too late, you'll be stuck having lunch. Not that there's anything wrong with lunch at El McD! Or as the French prefer, "McDo" (adorably pronounced "mik-doe" as seen in the NYC person-on-the-street interview segment of the engrossingly McDonald's-themed documentary Super Size Me). No sir - nothing wrong with lunch. Who among us didn't grow up on those little candyburgers? Those things were like candy, seriously! You'd undo that crinkly white wrapper ("100% USDA Grade A Beef" "Please Put Litter In Its Place") and one-hand that floppy little flap of a burger in two bites tops! I can still eat like six of those.
I don't, but I can.
Yeah, some people say White Castle, but to me, McD's white-wrapper candyburgers are the primo di tutti ootie of tiny burger satisfaction. I like the little diced-to-bits onions! Everything tiny.
The fries - there was a dodgy period there for awhile while they were tweaking the grease mix, but now the fries are pretty close to what they used to be (which was damn heavenly, man). Love those shoelaces. The shakes are still pretty good too! Don't they use yogurt now? I thought I heard they changed it to yogurt. It doesn't taste like yogurt. Maybe it was the sundaes that switched to yogurt and the milkshakes just switched to lowfat or two-percent or something. Maybe even nonfat. "100% Nonfat Powdered Dairy Analogue." That's about right, taste-wise. Only surprisingly good!
Except for that damn Toothpaste Shake. Who decided there should be a shake that tastes like toothpaste for St. Patrick's Day? What's toothpaste got to do with St. Patrick's Day? Did I miss something in the hagiography of this guy, did he - in between his whole snake-chasing schtick - pioneer oral hygiene techniques on the ol' Emerald Isle?
Discuss.
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