Dolphins.

Thank God I was not born a dolphin. I don't care how smart those happy fools are supposed to be, or how frolicsome their lives are. I'm glad for them! I'm happy for their evident happiness! Ignorance is bliss, as they say, but it's only bliss if you never get to know any better. I know better plenty. And I tell you, a life without thumbs is a poor substitute.

Still. I'm very happy for dolphins. Imagine if there were no dolphins! For lack of a better candidate, people would be trying to convince us that whales are as smart as we are.

Come on people. Get a little self-esteem as a species.