Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Saturday, August 09, 2008

Famous People, Dying of Pneumonia

Man, if I were a high profile celebrity on the brink of dying from pneumonia, I would make it a condition of my will that they put out a post-mortem press release flat-out stating I died of AIDS. Number one, who cares? Does anybody still seriously subscribe to the "divine punishment in this life" angle? That's a God-damned comedy act, if you ask me - and I use the term "God-damned" advisedly (and quite possibly literally, but I'll leave that one up to you-know-Who). Number two, everybody's going to be hinting around about it anyway, so why not? And number three, I'm going to be dead! Might as well make it count for something extra. Might as well drum up a fresh rash of donations for the still-at-least-#3 most popular disease cause.

I mean, screw pneumonia. What are they going to do with pneumonia? They can't cure that!

Hm. When I lay it out all frank like that...it kind of sounds a little unscrupulous.

I'd do it anyway. Stigma don't befront me none.

By the way: I tested clean. Just in case anybody thought I had some kind of bias.

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