I say the whole universe was created by this incredibly powerful alien, who is totally watching us at all times and totally judging us. And then at one point, this alien even took on human form to try convince us that it cares about us!! For real - it's true! People don't seem to see the truth on the surface, but the truth of it has been encoded into books and signs and such - even coded onto the very placards that people hold up at football games! For instance.
It's all true. There are even entire societies highly-placed throughout the earth, dedicated to pleasing and propitiating this alien in various ways. Oh sure, they all act as though they're all about spreading charity and love and kindness and good deeds and lifting people up and stuff. But really, when you look into it and get to the bottom of it...it's all about this alien. Crazy. Enormous portions of energy and money are being put into it. And there's nothing anyone can do about it. This alien...it's like it's got a grip on their souls.
But at least we all got a pretty sweet universe out of it, though. I often seem to lose sight of that.
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