Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Chuck Norris Facts: The Jesus Christ Edition

I'd like to throw this one out there, a bit of an audience-participation bonus for those of you who like such things. You're all familiar with the Chuck Norris Internet Facts? Well, here's a chance for you to post a comment with your own take on the Chuck Norris Facts, in the same spirit of tough-talk and bravado only featuring Jesus Christ instead of Chuck Norris. That's pretty self-explanatory, right? I don't need to explain that any further. It's a bam-pow head-smack sort of idea.

So go ahead, post your own Jesus-Themed Chuck-Norris-Inspired "Internet Fact"! Try to keep it to one "Fact" per comment please. If you get on a roll and come up with a bunch, it's still best to put one per. I'd love to see like fifty replies all told! And when they finally stop rolling in, I'll compile all the best ones into one big post in my part 2.

Right on!

I may even post a few myself, after it really gets rolling.


Sarah said...

You want us to think?!

Jesus is going to send you to Hell.

John Dantzer said...

When Jesus was a carpenter, he used his beard as sandpaper.

John Dantzer said...

Jesus nailed himself to the cross. When his left hand was nailed in, he swung the hammer with his teeth.

Lunarchick said...

When Chuck Norris goes to bed he puts on his Jesus pajamas.

Lunarchick said...

The plants watered with Jesus' bath water turn into mighty oaks.

dogimo said...

Excellent, excellent all! I need to add a few of my own.

Dang, though. They're not flowing!

I'll meditate upon it.