Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Take a Deep Breath for Gratitude!

Take a moment now to appreciate some of the things you might normally take for granted.

Your teeth, in whatever condition they may be.

A hot meal.

The very skull that holds your brain in - crucially important! Often overlooked.

Efforts by Bono on behalf of reducing the third-world debt crisis.

Whatever penis or vagina you may have. Check first to make sure (if you're not sure).

World Peace. Yes, I know it's not complete, and its not perfect, but there really is a shitload of world peace out there if you look around, and hardly anyone ever appreciates it. Why? Because of all these whining perfectionists! It's all all-or-nothing with that crowd. Meanwhile like, 95% of the globe at least is positively lousy with World Peace. Positively caked in the absence of active warfare. Feel free to dispute with me on that 95% statistic, if you wish to look like a FOOL. But you might take a hint first. Hint: the water alone covers about 2/3rds of that surface in question. Not that war won't float, but as history has shown, generally wars are fought over land.

Whichever toe is your personal favorite. Mine is the third toe on your left foot, counting from big to pinkie toe. I love that toe. My absolute favorite toe in the world - this little piggie had roast beef! I guess I do feel bad for poor piggie #4 though. Kind of a sad story, for him.

Your head. Now some of you trouble-makers may claim you have no hot meal to take for granted, or no favorite toe to count, or no teeth in any condition, or dispute me on the World Peace specifics, but I would bet doormats to hedgerows that each and every one of you at least has a HEAD. Yeah? Got you on that one, didn't I!

Damn right I did. Now have some fucking gratitude.

Take all of those things, consider and appreciate as many of them as you can, and maybe string the whole thing together in a tapestry of some kind that maybe says something to you about gratitude. And about the need for that. Because frankly, I think you might not have as much gratitude as you probably should have, without me here to prompt you.

Technically I guess the skull should be included under the head. But I stand by the way I put it - there's different aspects involved! And plenty to be grateful for to go around for each.


dogimo said...

Although really, all of the other piggies besides #3 had no roast beef either. Still, I feel bad for #4, because at least all the others had their own thing going on.

What a disturbing nursery rhyme! It appears to be about a dismembered foot. How do all these toes go their separate ways like that? Grisly doings!

I'm sure there's some grim event at the heart of it, lost to us now, lost to time. Some psychopath lopping off toes, back in the days of hay wains and villagers, and this charming little bit of frippery was concocted to explain it away, reassure the kids about the sort of world in which they live. That's how all these nursery tales and nursery rhymes start: something very nasty at the center. Turn it all into a joke. Wee-wee-wee all the way home and everyone collapse into giggles!

That's all well and good, but I prefer the nursery tales with the grim moral lesson.

Anonymous said...

Come on now...


I like the one next to the pinkie toe. That one gets no attention. Equal rights for that toe. I call him "Rathbone" and his twin "Elijah".

dogimo said...

YOU NAME YOUR TOES? Wow. Who are the others?

I do believe in equal rights for each toe. All toes were not created equal! But equality under the law is a separate issue - and in my mind at least, it's indisputable.

Lunarchick said...

Very true. We are so very complacent about all the great stuff we do have.

We have thumbs...THUMBS people! And these amazing incredible brain folds that allow us to store all kinds of useless and wonderful things like the memory of your 10th birthday or the lyrics to that tv jingle.Imagine life without all the fabulous things you have.

I do try to make it a practice of listing all the good things every once in awhile, especially when I am feeling a bit dark or whiny. I mean I have so much more than so many others who the heck am I to feel bad for myself? A home, a job (!), my knees, this computer, my husband, my cat, my warm slippers etc...

Yup taking a deep breath for gratitude is a great idea! :-)

dogimo said...

Thanks a lot, Alice. I can't remember my 10th birthday.

OH MAN! WAIT YES I CAN! Superhero Colorforms!

Thanks Alice! A lot. :-D

And my knees, too. I forget those, time to time.