"Look, if I were a cigar-chomping autocrat with one eye on the bottom line and the other on the least common denominator, I'd..."I was trying to come up with a sentence the other day, and that's what came out. But it's unfinished. It wasn't like there was any situation that would call for a sentence to start that way. I was just trying to come up with a good sentence. There was really nothing apropos of it. But then when I got that far - I thought it was one hell of a start for a sentence! And it'd be a shame to leave it hanging, like I've done so far.
So I'm coming to you guys. Any suggestions?
9 comments:
...kill myself.
...still think Deep Blue Something was a really lame band name"
I like that you asked our guts what they thought, Joe. I don't listen to my guts nearly enough. :-)
I also like that the character said "If I were a ..." instead of "If I was a..."
A grammatically-correct, cigar-chomping autocrat ... my favourite kind!
Although, he isn't is he... he is just saying, hypothetcially, that if he was ...
...spontaneously combust from all the effort and go stalk a hooker?
You set the bar way too high.
@JMH - that's awesome
@Mel - aw man! Now I have to leave the typo! No wait, I can change it. I'll just cite it here. Folks, it was originally: "So I'm coming to you guts. Any suggestions?"
@The Vegetable Assassin - what do you mean! All the respondents so far (yourself included) have either vaulted well over or limbo'd well under! :-D
"Look, if I were a cigar-chomping autocrat with one eye on the bottom line and the other on the least common denominator, I'd..."
"..have someone else make sure this cat doesn't keep coming back the very next day, if you know what I'm getting at...but unfortunately, all I can afford right now is you."
"..still have enough of a moral compass to refrain from dropping the nuke on that factory full of children!"
"..be doing this business on my own island, instead of in this rusty barn in the middle of nowhere."
"..I might actually wear that white silk ensemble you're suggesting because then no one would dare invoke my wrath, but here in the real world, I'll just have to go with the boring sensible suit."
(this could get really fun)
Paint all the horses red and ride myself to hell.
@jill - a neat mix of palpable menace and disturbing whimsy! Like it, like it.
@jorg - very high art literary! It reads like Dali's Shakespeare.
lose all will and ability to Charleston with finesse."
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