Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Monday, February 15, 2010

Some People Say #5: Your Boat or Mine?

Some people say "Whatever floats your boat."

Screw that! Screw other people's boat. I don't care what floats your boat! I want to know what floats my boat.

I mean, probably water, right? I'd suspect it would be water. But I don't know. I wish I knew.

See, the most insulting aspect of that saying is, I don't even have a boat. It's like rubbing my face in my own nonexistent boat! Who cares what floats my boat when I ain't got no boat?

My poor boat. I bet it sank.

6 comments:

Caz said...

Or if you had a boat, but not water in which to float it.

But you're right. What the hell is is supposed to mean?

What if I like jelly?

It would not be true to suggest that my boat was floated. It would be more correct to say that my boat was sitting on top of jelly, as opposed to floating on it.

Liking roast lamb or large cacti renders the boat-floating metaphor altogether more ridiculous.

dogimo said...

Exactly!

I even heard somebody say: "Whatever butters your bread!" I was like, really? What are my options?

JMH said...

I'd disqualify peanut butter, almond butter, and Nutella. Do they make goat butter?

dogimo said...

@JMH - surely they must! That sounds like a real "funky gourmet" item.

JMH said...

I bet it tastes like regular butter, but has bits of tin cans and Greek olives and whatever else goats eat.

dogimo said...

That doesn't sound like they'd stock it in the gourmet and specialty markets I had in mind.

I think the udders would filter out any actual solid bits, though. I think you'd be pretty much tin-free.

Now that I think about it, though - why would it be a specialty/gourmet item? What the heck about "goat" says "upscale"?

And yet they do seem to go in for that. I see a lot of goat dairy in those places.