What Do I Need to Bring to the Meeting?

"all you need to bring are your questions and insights."

- from the invite

That's what I bring to all my meetings! But then when I get there, if I've been told I don't need to bring anything, that means I expect it to be taken care of! Only to come in to the meeting room to a big disappointment: rarely if ever are coffee and donuts provided.

Coffee is pretty much "bring your own," okay, I can deal with that. Mine's better than theirs, anyway. But where are the donuts, or the bagels with fresh sliced tomatoes, onion, and a variety of spreads? Cheese and crackers, something! Shoot, I asked what you wanted me to bring. I could have brought something myself, if I knew there'd be nothing there for the meeting! That's why I asked.

It's a real problem with the corporate culture around here. The lack of meeting-suitable comestibles disgusts me to such an extent that as a subtle form of protest, I will now often show up to the meeting with a big rack of Cole's Famous BBQ ribs, slathered with Cole's delicious tangy BBQ sauce. No Cole's Slaw, beans or other sides, as those would require utensils.

I don't wish to overdo my subtle point.

Then I just dig in. Those are my ribs! If asked, I'd have bought plenty for everybody, but I wasn't asked. I was told it was taken care of.

Last time, though, they got me. I have to admit, they got me. Once too many times to the well! I walked in there with my big rack of steaming, tangy, well-slathered ribs, and there on the table, there they were: a whole assortment of donuts.

I felt like such an ass.

Comments

Elliott said…
The world needs more meetings that include ribs. BYOB(ib).

I hate meetings, as nothing in my life is less productive.
dogimo said…
Meetings, some of them turn out to be okay. Something gets decided.

But most of them, it's usually kind of like, "what was the point of that?"
Sarah said…
LIE. Don't bring anything except your well-prepared presentation about how to get us out of this financial disaster.
dogimo said…
@Sarah - yeah, every now and then they'll try to hit you with something that wasn't an agenda item.