A Shout-Out to All You Scantily-Clad Babes!

Hey! All you scantily-clad babes.

How are you doing?

This is my shout-out, specifically to you. Feel free to leave a holler at me in the comments. Tell me what you're wearing. Tell me what you're not wearing. Keep it respectable, though please.

Note: this is NOT a shout-out to all you nude babes out there. No offense, nude babes! It's just, look. I'm kind of an old-fashioned guy, so I'm always a little bit bashful interacting with nude babes, unless we're talking someone I really know. Otherwise, I wouldn't be likely to just, you know, "shout out." I'd be much more likely take a wait-and-see approach, as in: "Hm, this person is completely naked. Is she about to put clothes on, or what? I better hold my tongue for the nonce." See, a time like that is not the time to shout out. Could cause an unwanted startle: "What the hell are you shouting for?" And besides, what would I shout, anyway? "WooooooOOOOOooO!" Probably; yes. But as we've established, I wouldn't shout at all, so the point of "what I would shout" is moot.

Honestly? I'm just not sure what it is with you nude babes. What's your story, with the whole "no clothes" angle? I want to be clear, I'm not criticizing. I'm certainly no prude! And the human body is nothing to be ashamed of, but still. If you're naked, then where's the mystery? Actually, wait, that's not true - the naked is kind of a mystery in itself.

I've gotten off-track, here. The point is that I'm far more comfortable shouting out when presented with scantily-clad babes, than with nude babes. Nude babes, I'm going to hold off on the shout, at least until I get a sense of what the situation is. Maybe I'm going to be called upon to break out my charcoals and do a sketch? See, there is absolutely nothing lascivious or inappropriate about THAT outcome! Suddenly everything is all perfectly socially acceptable - and SHAME on those of you with your suspicions of prurient excess!

Yet even if the situation would have been developing along that innocent artistic path, suppose I'd suddenly decided to just haul off and shout "WooooooOOOOooO!" at the first sign of nudity! Well, that would almost certainly have derailed the delicately, artistically developing vibe. So as you can see, as an artist, as a feminist, I have to have a little more class than that. I just have to.

You know, I don't want to leave all you very heavily-dressed babes out in the cold on this one, either. Bundled up in your scarves and hats and coats. I can't make this a shout-out to you, as I've already specifically reserved the official "shout-out" aspect to those babes who are in fact scantily-clad, and I don't want to renege on that now. But still, to all you conservatively-clad, comprehensively-clad and even excessively-clad babes, please allow me to say:

"Hey. How do you do, there!"

I guess that about covers it.