This Post Is Liable To Suck

I'm kind of in a frustrated mode of mind right now and some damn hourglass is running forever and ever on my PC. And nothing I can do will speed it up or slow it down. So I'm going to type a stream of consciousness epic.

Blobba wobba dobba woo poo. Deepa doop dop. Reep dop a lop bop pop pkop.

Nah, too free-form.

How about this, I will write in another character. From within the perspective of a human being who isn't me. Hyper-realism.

My name is Susan. I am a female human being. I wear feminine clothes, such as a dress. It is surprisingly similar to being a male except less flap and dangle. The lesson learned: humans have more in common then the much-bruited gender divide would suggest!

That was a fruitful exercise. I will try another along the same lines.

My name is Daphne. My friends call me Daff! I am a female human being. I tend to wear jeans and shorts more than skirts and girly things. My breasts are a GOOD SIZE. I am not preoccupied with my breasts, because to me they are just part of the general and expected setup. It's perfectly natural I have breasts. I don't give it a thought. And let me tell you something, it doesn't occur to me to envy anyone's penis, either! Freud was just a weirdo as far as I'm concerned. The lesson learned: none. No lesson learned. Too busy living in the natural moment to set up questions and examine thought processes for some "answer." Lesson learned: sometimes its okay to just "be."

This is a good writing exercise. I'll try another.

My name is Kurk. I am a gay male. My identity is not overly wrapped up in such concerns as "straight-acting" or "gay-acting." My sexuality is simply a part of who I am. I am the ideal gay male.

This writing exercise is pretty awesome! I should figure out how it works and patent it. I'm developing well-rounded, complex characters off the top of my head! Maybe I can even use some of these for Fiction Friday. Down the line, I mean. This week's installment ("Avast! The Dungeoneers!") has already been written. Minor pre- and post-publication tweaks aside.

OK, now it's time to get a bit more creative with the exercise. I'm going to go a bit deeper this time.

My name is Stasholstus Vaer. I am a Wizard in the Harry Potter Universe, with all that muggle-struggle and backstory you're familiar with. I didn't go to Hogwart's. I went to one of the less-prestigious Wizard schools - like a Vo Tech, or the wizarding equivalent. However, despite that handicap I applied myself to the best of my ability, and graduated top of my class. I am a medium-powerful wizard. I'm considered a bit of a nerd in wizard circles, because of my enthusiasm for muggle culture. Particularly, my interest in the ways muggle culture sees and depicts magic. My wand is one of those stage-magician jobs, a slim black cylinder with a white tip. I dress in a top hat and tails, with a cape. I don't perform on stage! I don't do card tricks. No, I'm a full-on wizard, I just have this interest in the camp trappings of how the non-magical public sees magic. I'm part of a subculture that most wizards are embarrassed about. I am marginalized. I don't come into the story at all.

See?! Wow, that one was like the biggest one of all of them. Many more sentences.

This is a great writing exercise. Next time I'm stuck for something I'll try something like this.

Damn that hourglass. Still running.