Now! The Great New Post By ME, Your Host!!

That's right folks! This is the post you've been waiting for, or at least, it's the post that you're reading! So in that sense, during the time that you are in fact reading it, your eyes are in some sense* "waiting" for the next in the string of letters and words that unreel before the path of their insatiable gaze, as each sentence goes on and on and on and on along its inimitable ways! Illimitably? Interminably? Hardly! Because I just terminated and limited that last one, right before your eyes as you've only just seen! But of indeterminate length at least, or at least - it feels like it, halfway through a given sentence. Yet when this feeling draws out and you wonder what's waiting up ahead at the next bend, beyond the next fork in the syntax, as the twists and turns follow their own twinned and intertwined tangents back to where they branched off from in the first place and then retrace each other's steps respectively, surely the word to describe how you're feeling at the time is "suspense!" And to bring that suspense to satisfaction at last, yes, without further ado I bring you THIS: This post!

Which is, after all, hardly in need of any interruption for an introduction for you - you who have of course been reading it for some time by now! You are well, acquainted with it. Well acquainted. An acquaintance not tainted by any jadedness, nor do you preconceive any preconceptions about what might be in store for you as you continue reading! You've learned your lessons better than that, by now. Oh yes: and royally. For if there's one thing you've come to expect as you reflect upon the directions in which a post like this might split off infinitely and then continue indefinitely on from the point at which you first began to suspect you knew where it was going, it's this: nothing! And smarter money than that which was laid down on that bet, you will never count.

But enough! Give us more! - you say, and I for one hear you, and obey. No miser, I! I am not stingy with what you need, with the words words words the very blood of your brain thirsts for, your cranial veins parched as if from desert days as I leap out from behind a dune and crap a proverbial oasis into your eyes' ravening twin gullets! I slake you as if with a deluge. But this is ambrosial sustenance - food and drink, alike! Hydration and nutrition in one heady potion, but for the brain, mind you. A salubrious cerebral smoothie as it were, a blend of various potent symbolic bee pollens and wellness boosts, smashed into a puree of crushed ice with the juices of the many dripping fruits of imagination and mind. Specifically: mine. You like?

Your eyes, the doorways to the soul? More like, the feed-tubes down which the visual world shovels its cornucopious barrage of food - from junk, to comfort, to challengingly gourmet - food for you to consume, digest, process into suet perhaps, or else burn off the quicker calories in a burst of sweet, fast, cheap sugar rush to the intellect? It isn't as if you can get better than that, anywhere but here! Drink deep! Pour my sugared words spiked with vitamins of a purely notional variety into your eyes, as I myself churn into a frenzy in the kitchen way back behind, whipping up additional delicious fixes of sweets, bowls of hot piping, plates of savory, and uncountable, unaccountable courses galore - a smorgasbord bordering on the unendurable!

What more is there to say about that, I'd like to know.