Not a Hoax! Not a Dream! Not an Alternate-Universe Story!

Are you ready for this?

I got laid!

Yeah, that's right! Alriiiiight. I'm happy to report.

Actually, this all happened a while ago. Quite some time ago. Quite a long time ago in fact, actually.

Okay, it was in a previous life. But I got a certificate from my past-life regression recovery hypnospecialist! It's documented. I have a document!

It happened.

Maybe all you skeptics just need to deal with it.

Apparently, in this past life, I was a girl, though. Which feels a little funny. Given the cultural biases obtaining at the time, I'm not even sure I should be crowing about it.

I don't care, though. Point is: GOT SOME.

Jeez, though, it was a little weird. This hypnospecialist...when I woke up, my pants were unbuttoned. It was kind of weird.

Comments

limom said…
I was going to say something, but I suppose it's sort of obvious.
No, I guess for the sake of the other readers, I must:
Pics or it didn't happen!
TimT said…
I'm so happy for whoever you were, or, if the regression turns out to be a delusion, I'm so sorry for whoever you weren't!
dogimo said…
@limom - dude, I'd love to help out but this was all back in feudal times man. Pics hadn't even been invented yet.

@TimT - you've perfectly summed up my own peculiar mix of hypothetical elation and hypothetical sorrow!
Flea said…
So how long ago did this past life occur? And were you a human?
dogimo said…
Human! Yes definitely!

I don't know the exact date. I get the sense it was late medieval. Like maybe the Renaissance was already going on, someplace, a light had already been lit - but its glow didn't reach to me.