ALL-CAPS CONFESSIONS #2

WHEN I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL I KNEECAPPED MY ALGEBRA TEACHER WHO I'D BEEN SLEEPING WITH FOR CHEATING ON ME, AND THEN I LIED ABOUT IT. ACTUALLY I LIED ABOUT IT RIGHT HERE. SHE DIDN'T CHEAT ON ME. I WASN'T SLEEPING WITH HER, EITHER. IN FACT I'VE NEVER KNEECAPPED ANYBODY, I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW ALGEBRA WORKS.

Comments