ONE TIME I FELL HALF-WAY DOWN STAIRS. THEN I SAID, "FUCK IT" AND FELL THE REST OF THE WAY DOWNSTAIRS.
IT JUST WASN'T WORTH GETTING BACK UP. ALSO, THE STAIRS WERE REALLY...THICKLY CARPETED.
NO, I WAS NOT DRUNK. AT LEAST, I WAS NOT THAT DRUNK. NOT SO DRUNK THAT I WOULD DO THAT.
WAIT.
OK I GUESS TECHNICALLY I WAS.
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