"Arachne we praise as a crafts pioneer - discovered both linen and nets, so we hear, and her skill as a weaver was second to none! Not even Athena, she boasted. And won! The goddess accepted the challenge, so vain - but for mortal to win such a contest means pain - and"
Wait. This doesn't fucking work. Dr. Zseuss needs there to be GOOFY WORDS.
Someone could use the pseudonym Rolled Daal and re-write all those classic children’s books into the form of recipes.
When I was younger I was disturbed by the fact that some siblings with the surname Grimm were allowed to write stories for kids. I used to envision them at a ye olde writing table, quill scratching and candlelight flickering, looking all gloomy and dismal and, you know, grim... jotting down dark tales of woe betides so young minds would learn whatever fableic moral they were supposed to be absorbing.
I guess I still kinda hope someone will rejig them in a more upbeat fashion, maybe under the nom de plume The Brothers Hey-Things-Ain’t-That-Bad.
4 comments:
OH MY GOD YES
"Arachne we praise as a crafts pioneer
- discovered both linen and nets, so we hear,
and her skill as a weaver was second to none!
Not even Athena, she boasted. And won!
The goddess accepted the challenge, so vain -
but for mortal to win such a contest means pain - and"
Wait. This doesn't fucking work. Dr. Zseuss needs there to be GOOFY WORDS.
I'll try again, when in a proper frame of mind.
Ha!
Like it.
Someone could use the pseudonym Rolled Daal and re-write all those classic children’s books into the form of recipes.
When I was younger I was disturbed by the fact that some siblings with the surname Grimm were allowed to write stories for kids. I used to envision them at a ye olde writing table, quill scratching and candlelight flickering, looking all gloomy and dismal and, you know, grim... jotting down dark tales of woe betides so young minds would learn whatever fableic moral they were supposed to be absorbing.
I guess I still kinda hope someone will rejig them in a more upbeat fashion, maybe under the nom de plume The Brothers Hey-Things-Ain’t-That-Bad.
Hm. I wonder if that's what Terry Gilliam was trying to do in that movie?
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