Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Just Once, Perry Mason. Just Once.

Now don't get me wrong, Perry Mason was a kickass defense attorney. So kickass, in fact, that he never got anyone off except by calling the REAL guilty party to the witness stand, and sneakily browbeating them into a confession!

Just once, I'd have liked to see the defendant get off - "not guilty!" - and then after the case, the victorious team walking out of the court building, everybody suddenly turns to Perry and says "Hey wait a minute! What about the guilty party, Perry? You forgot to solve the case!" And then Mason goes, "Oh, it was our guy. He did it." And they're all shocked and disillusioned, and he just hauls off and eviscerates them (and by proxy, the audience, with its harmfully childish warped wish-fulfillment view of criminal justice). I picture Perry really tearing into them, making brutal point after point (better than I can do it, hell I am sure - he's a professional!) and capping it all off with a steely glare directly into the camera: "We're DEFENSE ATTORNEYS."

1 comment:

Kellie @ Delightfully Ludicrous said...

LOL! It's been years since I've seen Perry Mason, but I'd have loved to see that!