~ This Post is a Part 2. There was also a Part 1. ~
Ok, I just had a guy pay me $5 for "The Trick" crash course life improvement program. Accordingly this notice herby notifies all and sundry that I have begun employing this mark for this service as a "mark in trade," and that if my mark can be demonstrated to infringe on a similar mark for the same class of product or service, I thereby owe that rights-owner five bucks then, don't I? Fuck your legal fees pal! Let's see your C & D demonstrate infringement first, because as I've always and already informed you - once it's demonstrated, I immediately comply.
You'll never have to file suit on me. File suit without C & D'ing me and you'll be paying my legal fees, pal. I get that legal letter with infringement clearly demonstrated, I won't waste one minute or a single dime! I'll take it to my fucking attorney and see what she has to say. She has no fool for a client. If she agrees you've got the mark, or even feels it's arguable enough to go to court - I'll just call it something else! Easy. Especially for me, I come up with better business ideas than that during sex. But to be honest, here, I'd caution you. I'm of the opinion that you don't have an enforceable mark. To be honest. I bet upon examination, my service and product is going to be so different from yours as to be a completely different type of product or service, and wholly unconfusable with yours. Whatever the hell yours is. And even assuming it exists! Screw your legal fees. At best you'll be paying MINE, pal. Watch it.
Hell technically, I don't even have to give you the five dollars. I'd only be doing that because to me, that's all part of my sweet trick.
Also part of The Trick, you can see above displayed the decency and dignity we were talking about earlier. That's where the "one encounter at a time" case-by-case aspect comes in so crucial! None of your absolutism here, none of your idiotic inapplicable universal principles. Those don't work case-by-case, because there you have to proceed on merit. Your Ideals, your Virtues, will never ever work on merit. Except maybe in the freak case where one happens to pertain, but you could live and die waiting for that to happen.
On merit, case-by-case, you'll see the above example pertains to "dude got his lawyer involved." Due consideration for etiquette is advised in such a case! And let me tell you, your lawyer's not going to feel belittled by a little straight talk. It will refresh them. And then they will assure you how decent I've been, to caution your ass. Which will reassure you! You'll be like - "that Sweet-Trick bastard! He had my dignity in mind the whole time!" I sure did. And then they'll invoice you.
THE TRICK. It works. Even there, you can see how well it works!
I used to call it Invincible Professionalism, but then I saw that #1 I'd been acting the same way off work for years. Long before I came up with the brilliant idea to act that same way on the job. And who the hell knew it would work? Nobody acts that way on the job! I thought I was a genius when it worked even better. But also, #2, I kind of had to stop calling it Invincible Professionalism because...well, to be honest, in practice, in conjunction with my specific personality, there's nothing particularly professional about it. Nothing all that professional my sweet THE TRICK. Tee-Em.
I tell you what though, it's weird. It's weird what to call it, and it's weird how to class it, but you better believe whether I come up with a better name or not I am as of now in business with this. This sweet trick of mine is a gold mine on cloud nine, people! Because you know what? "Change the world"? Hell yes! People will eat that up, and I intend to charge by the barge for the pleasure of enriching their fucking lives.