OK, I've revised my opinion on this and now I will definitively say: GROSS. The whole thing's just gross!
I happened to be doing Karaoke on Saturday Night, and halfway through U2's song "So Cruel" it just hit me what a horror, what a violation that setup is of everybody involved. Plus anyone watching. That's entertainment?! That's human contact? It's like... it's like... as an American I can't stand for it. Look, the Japanese gave us karaoke, so maybe I'm out of my depth here on what I've got any right to speak on, but I'm pretty sure Americans invented handjobs so, you know what, they got their chocolate in our peanut butter on this one.
Handjob Karaoke critique: final verdict, gross. PRET-TY GROSS.
The above is not in any way a critique of what people do freely with and to each other. To me it reduces to the all-too-pervasive power of life as entertainment, increasingly: of voyeurism as performance art, which in my view cheapens and degrades what should be a human and uplifting ritual where one person - any one person - can get up in front of everyone watching and murder the work of somebody famous (or at least famouser). And expect to get cheered for it. To hold their head up high, afterwards - and go back to their seat without having left something essential of themselves on the stage they vacate.
So, whatever, what I'm saying is I'm not trying to knock anybody's kink or combination theirof. Anyone who has a taste for exhibitionism, sexual OR musical, I just feel like such things should either not be combined, or else be done as a guerrilla act, an act of civil disobedience and if the cops catch you at it, NO: you did not have a permit for that. You'll both get a stern talking-to, and you'll be getting your picture taken and have some fucking paperwork to do. Which to me is just how it should be: you take a risk, it increases the high, right? Society doesn't have to condone that shit and you don't want them to. Right?
It's not the combination of manual gratification and singing to a canned track I condemn, it's the idea of making it something any pussy can do because they're drunk and somebody dared them. You know? And later, how do they feel about that spectacle? CHEAPENED? DEGRADED? VIOLATED POSSIBLY? Well, whoever got involved it's their own fault. And responsibility is theirs for what they done, but I don't think we should put our stamp on it. It should take a hero (and I guess, an accomplice - although which one's which or who is the sidekick in that situation I leave to the comic book fans) to bust out in front of people and pull some shit like that! And the people should feel surprised, shocked, indignant - an act like that should have power. It's the cheapening I object to, principally.
Basically, it only took this one fucking cheapjack Japanese nil-budget stunt game show to turn me into a fucking prude. I've crossed the line now. So much for mister libertarian. Now I'm the guy all "We As A Society Should Not Condone!" LUCKILY, GOOD NEWS #1: Who the fuck am I? Why does my say go? IT DOESN'T. My say don't go, would be good news #2 I guess, or #1a.
Good news #2, 3 or 1b should be at the very least: I may not have say here, but I think I make a powerful argument and I bet society at large in the various civilized, media-degenerating cutting edge consumer-driven marketplaces of ideas will agree with me on this one: Handjob Karaoke crosses the line.
Big frown, guys. I give it a big frown on this one. Seriously. I mean, the above is pretty much my straight-up, considered and settled retrospect on this. My opinion on this one feels like home to me. I don't think I'll be acquiring the taste for this sort of tasteless display. It's fucking degrading to all of us, if we permit this sort of filth on our aetherwaves.
But I'm interested in other perspectives though! What do you guys think? I can never tell sometimes when I've stuck the landing and hit home exactly where I ought to have, or if I'm in that moment's suspense at rest at the end of a swing too far, pendulum-wise.
I say it's handjob karaoke that has swung too far. Have you guys heard about this? It was in the news last week and I for one was appalled, or if I wasn't then I am now. Last week it seemed kind of tastelessly charming and even amusing even. Not now. Sorry. Handjob Karaoke represents the absolute pinnacle of the slippery slope as far as I've so far seen, and we better wake up before we all end up in the audience witness to something we really didn't want to accompany our evening out. People need to speak out at this point - otherwise, where's the moral compass?!
I've done my part. The next is up to you.
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