Through most of my life I have been convinced either A) I do not have a subconscious ("subconscious mind" I suppose would be more correct. I will not be referring to it as a "subconscious mind" - I will be referring to it as a subconscious. DAMN though, I do dearly wish it could be correctly called "a subconscience")
I'll come in again.
Through most of my life I have been convinced either A) I do not have a subconscious, or B) if I do have one, it is almost completely vestigial, atrophied - inconsiderable, at any rate, in terms of whatever influence it has to exert. Because in general, as I act and occasionally, retroactively examine my actions for any discernible motive, I'm pretty sure there aren't any hidden or submerged influences rattling around down there. I mean, there really truly usually don't seem to be ANY. I'm kind of shallow and 'surface' - as far as I can perceive, anyhow. You know?
BUT SOMETIMES I'M AFRAID THAT MAYBE MY SUBCONSCIOUS IS ENORMOUS AND CONTROLS MY EVERY CONSCIOUS THOUGHT AND ACTION. WHAT IF IT IS? WHAT IF I WILL NEVER KNOW THE INSCRUTABLE PULSES AND IMPULSES THAT UNGOVERNABLY IMPEL ME TO THE ACTS I SO BLITHELY WING MYSELF THROUGH??
The point is, if that turns out to be the case, then...damn it!! I KNEW IT. Son of a bitch.