Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Profanity's on the way out, people.

I'm telling you, profanity is on the way out. By late 2012 at best, people are going to be saying any kind of what you'd call bad words without batting an eye. People will be like, "what is the big deal? It's just a bunch of syllables." By 2017, the word "motherfucker" is going to be used without batting an eye in television advertisements. It'll be as prevalent and accepted and expected as the word "eXtreme!!" was in the early-to-early-mid 1990s. There will be established brands landing on the bandwagon trying to update their slogan. There will be impassioned testimonials with the word tossed in just to add a little faded, belated, by-then-cliched zing. You'll see spots like:
Sad-looking man: "When the doctor told me I had diabetes, it hit me like a motherfucker. But then he told me something else, something with a little hope in it: now there's Zorpoflorvophlanzintüzex."
Or,
Narrator (over slow-motion product shots): "Rich milk chocolate...soft nougat. Gooey caramel. Packed with peanuts, Snickers is a motherfucker."

Deep voiceover, with text onscreen: "SNICKERS. It's A Motherfucker."

Everyone is going to be like, who cares? Bad words - what! Huh? Special powerful words, you cast curses at people with? Is this Harry Potter or something? Bad words, come on. What happens when you say them, demons? Seizures? Bad breath?

Just you watch and wait. I'm telling you now. People won't even know what you're talking about, "bad words."

8 comments:

John Dantzer said...

This is so funny. But I'm sure new words will be invented that will be worse. Something about the universal mother.

dogimo said...

You think? New curse words. I don't know, I think people are running out of respect for the idea of certain sounds being intrinsically bad (yet the synonym isn't!). I don't think there's a good way to invest new words with that same profane mystique.

I think it's a good thing. If somebody wants to be insulted, at least they should insist on being insulted with some meaning, some creativity - and not some just with some stock, arbitrary bad button word.

Mel said...

You called it.

http://www.news.com.au/business/nuckin-futs-set-to-go-on-sale-after-lawyer-argues-f-word-wont-offend/story-e6frfm1i-1226247137467

dogimo said...

Um.

Mel.

Are you saying that down there...the "F-word" signifies "futs"?

I'd say somebody's futzing around.

Mel said...

Nup. Just giving you kudos.

In June 2009 dogimo wrote…

By late 2012 at best, people are going to be saying any kind of what you'd call bad words without batting an eye. People will be like, "what is the big deal? It's just a bunch of syllables.

*CUE MYSTICAL MUSICAL*

AND THEN, AS PREDICTED!, IN 2012 THIS HAPPENS.

It was successfully argued that the word "f..." is a normal part of Australian speech and so cannot be deemed offensive.

It is now "commonplace in everyday Australian language and is now part of the universal discourse of the ordinary Australian".


Ipso facto ergo spaghettio, you called it.

dogimo said...

Well, I got the hypothetical applicability and was all provisionally prepared to reap the props, but then I looked at the article itself and the "F" word at the center of the dispute was FUTS.

Futs.

I don't see that as in any way connected with the profane. Spoonerism?

I think this was a case of a riotously inapplicable application being made of profanity via wordplay, via pun, and the real thing that was overturned was that a thing could be profanity by proxy.

But I do concede that the lawyer, to the credit of his balls, did seem to stake much of his case on "fuck" being a commonplace. Good on him, but the original ruling was a stretch so far that I can't see the precedent here governing in any absolute way.

We may have to wait for a clearer test case later in the year. Hang in with me, Mel! I'll prove your faith right yet!

Mel said...

Seems you were right to be hesitant as to whether this was a conclusive approval of so-called “profanity”. Seems Australian and UKian advertising authorities differ quite substantially on their POV on this.

http://www.news.com.au/world/sofa-king-ad-banned-in-uk-over-f-bomb-similarity/story-e6frfkyi-1226285582139

To Profanity, Australia Says "Fuck Yeah!"

To Profanity, The UK says “No. Fuck"

dogimo said...

It often seems I'm right, Mel. But I try to remain skeptical until I see some CLEAR PROOF.

I think Australia only said futs yeah to profanity?

HAHAHAH! "OUR PRICES ARE SOFA KING LOW!" Aw, that's a shame. How can people in the U.K. possibly be sofa king stupid. I look up to those dudes normally!