Do You Feel Lucky?

(and feel free to comment! My older posts are certainly no less relevant to the burning concerns of the day.)

Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Howabouta #1: Kitchen Invasion with Gordon Ramsay!

Howabouta show where Gordon Ramsay just shows up at your house to ask permission to come in and cook you absolutely the most delicious meal you've ever had out of only what you've got on hand, while scathingly upbraiding you for yours and your larder's deficiencies?

Gordon Ramsey would make a great Batman villain.

So anyway, while he's doing that, you're busy frantically contacting and rounding up six people on no notice to come over, be on tv and enjoy the feast! He may also let you help with you-level tasks.

The whole point is to give Ramsay a real challenge. Test his ingenuity. But to make it a bit fairer, for Ramsay, the guest host, the producers and the viewers, each episode starts with Ramsay working a live surveillance team at the local supermarket. This gives him a leg up, a chance to roll the dice based on a hint and a hunch - he can't blame the producers when he picks his own fate! What you've put in your cart, how you're dressed, your general bearing and deportment - careful, Ramsay may be watching you. Once he picks his shopper, it's on! The team expertly tails them home, gives them five minutes and then - ding-dong!

Hi, I'm Gordon Ramsay from Kitchen Invasion. Can I come in and cook for you on tv?

Seriously, who'd say no to that? Gordon Ramsay asking nicely. But you'd be surprised, because each episode features a hilarious montage of people who turned him down! Some quite nastily, even. Oh, the America.

Good Lord, people! There's already a show called Kitchen Invasion! Where its chefs travel to film episodes in people's kitchens! They seem to be downplaying the stalking, ambush, and verbal abuse angle. Those are the keys to the show's high-stakes drama and appeal! Wow, what a waste.

Well, thank God I looked that up without going any further with this.

Those dudes need to get Gordon Ramsay.


Monday, January 29, 2018

THE BIG QUESTIONS. #1: What Do People Want From Life?

What Do People Want From Life?

People want different things. Not all of them, though! Some want the same thing. The people who want different things may be lonely, if they want someone to share what they find and create, but no one is there. It's because what they found and created was what they want. Other people didn't want it. It was different.

The people who want the same thing don't always have it easy, either. Some of them have a hard time finding other people who want the same thing. It can be incredibly lonely knowing you want the same thing, but you're the only one you can find who wants it. Other people find the same thing, only to discover it isn't what they wanted. Maybe it doesn't live up to their expectations. You can spend your whole life trying to get the same thing, only to find out it's something else. It's different.

So in the final analysis, people generally want different things. The trick is, to find out what YOU want from life, and then trick someone into giving it to you. In the analysis shortly following the previously-final analysis, that's a pretty good trick!

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Mega-Pertinent Announcement For Fans Of Online Poetry Or Arbitrary Quantity-Based Writing Prompts! OR BOTH

So in 2006 apparently, I started my poetry blog, A Pocketful of Poesy. That's https://apocketfulofpoesy.blogspot.com/.

Alongabout 2009, I'm guessing July of, I realized it was pretty sweet and easy going, writing these poems. So easy in fact that I felt with a little application, writing one a day should be no trouble at all. By "a little application" I don't mean a software dittydoo you install on your iThingy - those hadn't been invented yet, not in 2009. Or if they had, no wait. They had, but that's not I meant by "a little application." I meant good old-fashioned bull-forwardness. Or ox-forwardness, probably - keep to the path and PLOW ASS, so to speak. Muleforwardness. In human terms, a little of the ol' greasy-elbow magic! This, I meant "application" by.

Did you know that historians have considered the ox to be an invention? By that standard, surely man is an invention! Somebody saw an angel and said "Wonder whut if we cut its wings off?" Then they were like, "Huh, looks hurt. And kinda lonely. Whut if we pull one of his ribs out?"

Now that that's cleared up. So 'longabout July 2009, I declared that henceforward, A Pocketful of Poesy would be a poem-a-day blog, on average. I even committed to make up the difference for 2009's slow start, which I did. It was easy. Don't believe me? Check out some of the poems for yourself! Especially during some of those epic Novembers, where the "Drive for 365" really hit the fan. November 2009: 103 poems! Nov 2017: 172 POEMS. Browse through some of those if you can't tell the difference between a poem that was easy and a poem that was hard. Trust me, some of them were easy. Some of them, you can pretty much tell. Don't believe me? See if I care!

You do realize, though, that when you scoff at my claimed ease, you only multiply my efforts - and magnify the glory they reflect upon me. Thank you, but no need! Being an online poet is glory enough, I assure you.

Where where we? Wherever it was, after that things went along swimmingly for years. 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012...right up through 2013, when I suddenly quit 227 poems in. Perhaps I decided it was unseemly, beneath my dignity to churn out poems as if on some clockwork basis, where the number and not the quality mattered.

Well guess what? I was WRONG. Nothing on earth is beneath my dignity - and precious few things in the heavens.

So it is with great honor and a modicum of tardiness that I announce, beginning last year (2017), A Pocketful of Poesy is again a POEM-A-DAY(-ON-AVERAGE) BLOG!

Wednesday, January 10, 2018

Word of the Day: "avuncular"

"Avuncular" means "of, like, or in a manner reminiscent of uncles." What is the corresponding term for aunts?
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"Auntie-avuncular"

Monday, January 08, 2018

Monday, January 01, 2018

Thought of the New Year: Happy

Happy New Year. May your dreams be made of the possible, and may waking bring practical means.