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Fantasy Football Epiphanies #1

on September 16, 2013

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Hiding Under Bed
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Hobbes
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horseradish
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Hot Fuzz
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How Come
how much more narrow and shallow can you get
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Hugh Jackman
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Human Trafficking
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Ides of March
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IHOP
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Immigrant
Impersonating A Police Officer
impulses
inanity
inarguable
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indefensible
Independence Day
indexability
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Indians
indigenous peoples
indisposed
inevitability
infamy
infinity
influenza
inheritance
inhibitions
injury
injustice
innuendo
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introductions
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INXS
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Iron Chef
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Isaac Asimov
Islam
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J Geils
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Jackie Chan
Jacob's Ladder
James Bond
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Jazzy Jeff
je t'aime
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Jennifer Lopez
Jenny Lewis
Jenny Owen Youngs
jerks
Jerome
Jess Lane
Jessica Alba
Jesus Christ
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jibs
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Jim Vallance
Jimmy Eat World
Jimmy Fallon
jingoism
Joan
jocularity
Joe Perry
Joe Walsh
John Basedow
John Cusack
John Edwards
John Philip Sousa
John Waite
Johnny Marr
jokes
Jolly Green Giant
Joseph Heller
journalism
joy
Judaism or Jewishness
judgment
Jump Through Window
Jumping Off Bridge
June
Jung
juries
justice
justifications
juxtaposition
Kafka
Kahlil Gibran
kalamata olives
Kanye West
karaoke
karma
Katy Perry
kazoo
ketchup
Kevin Smith
keys
KFC
Kick Door In
Kicked In The Crotch
Kicked In The Face
Kidnapping
kinda childish
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King Kong
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kiss
kites
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kiwi
Klaxons
Kmart
Knife
knowledge
Kool Moe Dee
Kosovo
KPIG
Krypton
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Kurt Cobain
L.A. Confidential
labels
Labor Day
Ladysmith Black Mambazo
Lake San Antonio
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language
Larry Bird
Larry King Live
Larry Mullen
larynx
Las Vegas
Latin
laughter
laundromat
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laziness
Leap Year
Led Zeppelin
legacy
legend
legos
lemmings
lemonade
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Leonardo Di Vinci
Leonardo DiCaprio
Lesbian Gay Bi Transgendered Pride
lessons
letdowns
Lethal Weapon 2
letters
Liam Finn
Liam Neeson
liberty
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license plates
lies
life
light
lighthouses
lightning
limes
limits
Lincoln
Lindsay Lohan
linguistics
Lionel Richie
lions
liposuction
lips
liquid
lists
literature
Little Known Facts
liverwurst
LL Cool J
logarithms
logic
Logos
logs
Loki
loneliness
loofas
looks
loons
Los Angeles
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loss
lottery
love
Luciano Pavarotti
luck
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lunch
lust
luxuries
lycanthropy
Lyme Disease
Lynyrd Skynyrd
lyrics
Macy's
mad
Madonna
magic
Magic Hat
Maglite brand flashlights
magnesium
Magpie
Majestic Dragon
malted
manifestos
mankind
manliness
mantras
maple syrup
maracas
marathon
Marcel DuChamp
marine botany
Mark Knopfler
Mark Wahlberg
marketing
marriage
martial arts
Martin Luther King Jr
Marx
Mary
Mary Baker Eddy
Mary Sue
masks
masochism
massage
mastery
mates
mathematics
Matt Damon
maturity
maudlin sentimentality
maxims
mayhem
mayonnaise
MC Chris
MC Escher
MC Frontalot
MC Funkee Duncan
McCain
McDonald's
McMelty
McNuggets
me
meaning
meanness
meat
medals
media
Medicare
medicine
mediocrisy
meditation
meekness
meetings
Megan Fox
melitism
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memes
memory
memos
men
menstruation
mental illness
merchandising
Mercury
mercy
message
message boards
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metaphors
meteors
methamphetamine
methinks
method
Metric
Mexicans
mice
Michael Crichton
Michael Dukakis
Michael Jackson
Michael Stipe
Michel Gondry
microbes
Midnight Oil
Mike Tyson
military
milk
milkshakes
Milky Way
mindja
minorities
miracles
misanthropy
mischief
misery
misogyny
misspellings
mistakes
Mitch Hedberg
mixed metaphors
MMPI
mockery
modern-day warrior mean mean pride
Modernism
modesty
mold
mom
monarchy
monday
Monet
money
monkeys
monopoly
monsters
months
mood
morality
mornings
morons
Morrissey
mortality
mother-of-pearl
mothers
moths
Motley Crue
motorcycles
Motorhead
mottos
Moulin Rouge
mountains
movies
moving
Mozart
Mr. T
MTV
mud
muffaletta
multiverses
mundaneity
murdah
murder
muscles
muse
museums
music
musicals
Mustangs
mustard
mutants
my keen eye
My Toyota Tercel
My Webcomic
MySpace
mystery
mysticism
mythology
nails
naked
names
napkins
narration
NASA
Natalie Portman
nature
nausea
Nazis
Neck Breaking Scene
necrophilia
need
Needle
negotiation
neighborhoods
Neil Finn
Neil Sedaka
Neil Tennant
neologisms
nervousness
neurophysiology
neurosis
New Age
New Age crap
New Direction
New Jersey
New Kids On The Block
New Order
New Years
New York City
New Yorker
Newcastle Brown Ale
news
NFL
niceness
Nicholas Kirkwood
Nick
nickels
Nicolas Cage
night
nightmares
ninjas
Nixon
No Country For Old Men
No More Tears
Nobel Prize
noises
non-bullshit
Noonie
normal
noses
nostalgia
not even funny
notability
novelizations
novels
now
nuclear
nudism
nudity
numbers
nurses
nutrition
nuts
oaths
oats
Obama
obey
obituaries
objectification
oblivion
observations
obsessions
occult
ocean
offers
okay
OKGO
OLD BAY
olives
OMG
omniscience
On Through The Night
One Word Title
onion
onus
onychophagia
OOCCOOPS
openness
opera
opinion
opportunities
oppression
optical illusions
optimism
oranges
order
ordering
orders
organisms
organs
originality
orthodontia
Orwell
outreach
overhead
overheard
oversimplifications
Overturning Car
ovulation
Owen Gleiberman
ownership
oxen
Pac Man
pacifism
Pacino
pain
painting
pajamas
paleontology
Palin
pancakes
pandenominationalism
panties
pants
parables
paradox
paranoia
paranormal
parenting
parents
Paris
parking
parkour
parks
parties
Pascal's Wager
pasta
pastrami
pathetic
pathetiquette
pathos
patience
Patrick Swayze
patriotism
Paul Giamatti
Paul Hester
Paul Newman
Paul Thorn
pay phones
peace
peaches
peacocks
peahens
pedantry
pedophilia
pee pee
penguins
penises
pennies
perception
Percy Bysshe Shelley
perfection
personal revelations
personality
perspective
perversion
Pet Shop Boys
Pete Yorn
Peter Gabriel
Peter Hook
pets
peurile
Phenomenauts
Phil Collen
Phil Collins
Philadelphia
Philip Seymour Hoffman
Phillies
philosophy
phlegm
phobias
Photobucket
photography
photosynthesis
phrases
physics
picketing
pickles
picks
pickup lines
picnics
pictures
pie
piece
piercings
pigs
pilots
piñatas
Pinback
pineapple
Pink Floyd
pirates
Pistol Whip
pitches
pith
pity
pizza
placebos
plagiarism
planets
plans
Plato
plays
Please Forgive Me
plein-air
plums
plungers
Pluto
pneumonia
poems
poetry
poetry clinic
pointlessness
points
poison
poker
police
policy
politeness
politics
polls
polyester
Polynesia
pomposity
Ponce De Leon
pone
pool
Poor Bee
pop culture
Pop Star
Pop Tarts
popcorn
popsicles
popularity
porn
portmanteaux
Portugal
positivity
posterity
Postmodernism
potatoes
potential
poverty
power
practice
Prague
pranks
prayer
preaching
precipices
precocity
predictions
pregnancy
prejudice
premises
preparedness
prepositions
prescriptions
preserves
Presidents
pressure
pretentiousness
pretty hard core shit right there
pretzels
previews
prickles
pricks
pride
priests
Prince
principles
priorities
privacy
privilege
Pro Bowl
probability
problems
procrastination
procreation
prodigies
productivity
profanity
progress
prohibition
prolificacy
promises
pronouns
proof
propaganda
properties
prophecy
proposals
prosciutto
prostheses
Prostitute
proverbs
prudes
PSA
pshaw
psychology
psychopaths
psychosis
Public Enemy
public nuisances
public transit
publicity
puerile
Pulp Fiction
pumpkins
Punched In The Face
punctuation
punk
puns
purity
purpose
pus
puzzles
pyromania
Q-Tips
quality
quantum theory
quarters
Queen
question mark
questions
Qui-Gon Jinn
quiche
quitting
quotes
rabbits
race
Racer X
Rachel Weisz
racism
radio
rage
rain
Raised Middle Finger
ramekins
randomness
rangers
rants
rap
rape
rapping
ratings
razor blades
razors
reactions
reading
Reagan
reality
reality shows
reason
rebus
recipes
recognition
redemption
redirect
redundancies
redundancy
references
reform
refrigerators
regards
regret
reincarnation
relationships
relaxation
relief
religion
relish
reminiscences
remorse
remote viewing
renaissance fairs
Renee Zellweger
repartee
repentance
repetition
replicants
repost
reptiles
requests
resolutions
respect
response
responsibility
Restaurant RIP
restaurants
resumes
retractions
revenge
Revenge Motive
reverence
reveries
reversals
revolution
rewards
rhetoric
rhinotillexis
ribs
Richard Dreyfuss
Richard Thompson
riddles
Ridley Scott
right
right of way
Righteous Rage
Rights
rigor
risks
Ritchie Valens
Rivers Cuomo
Road Safety Corner
roads
Robert Downey Jr.
robots
rock
Rock Of Love
Roger Ebert
Roger Waters
role models
roll
romance
Romantic
Rome
rose petal jam
roses
Rosey Grier
Roy Batty
royalty
rude
Rufus Wainright
rules
rumors
Rush
Russia
Ryan Karels
rye
SAAB
sabotage
sacrifice
sacrilege
Saddam Hussein
sadism
sadness
safety
sagacity
sailors
saints
salmon
salt
same fucking thing
Samuel L. Jackson
sandwiches
sanity
Santa Claus
Santa Cruz
Sara
Sarah Silverman
sarcasm
Satan
satire
saturday
sauce
sayings
Scabble
scabies
scams
scandals
Scarlett Johansson
scatology
scenarios
schism
schizophrenic
scholarship
schools
science
science fiction
scientists
Scientology
scissors
Scorcese
scoring
scorn
Scott Baio
scrambled eggs
Screaming
screeners
screenplays
sculpture
scumbags
Scwewy Wabbit
sea shanties
sealing wax
Seanibus
search engines
second-guessing
Secret Dog
secrets
seduction
self
self-esteem
self-examination
self-portrait
self-recrimination
selfishness
semantics
sensation
sentences
sequels
serendipity
serious
service
SETI
sex
sex offenders registry
Sex Trade
sexism
sexuality
sexy
SFW
shakes
Shakespeare
shame
shameless self-promotion
shampoos
sharks
Sharpie®
shaving
sheep
shirts
shit
shit pops
shizzle
shock
shoes
Shootout
shopping
short stories
Shot In The Arm
Shot In The Back
Shot In The Chest
Shot In The Forehead
Shot In The Leg
Shot In The Shoulder
Shot In The Stomach
Shot Through Window
Shot To Death
showering
shrubbery
Sia Furler
siblings
sighs
signs
silence
silicon
silliness
Silversun Pickups
Simon and Garfunkel
simplicity
sin
Sinatra
sincerity
sinners
sitcoms
skepticism
skin
skit
sky-diving
slack
slang
slavery
sleep
sliced bread
slogans
slurs
sluts
small talk
smartassery
Smashing Pumpkins
smell
smoking
smoldering sexual chemistry
smooth
Smurfs
snacks
snails
Snickers
Sno-White Drive In
snobs
snot
Snow Patrol
snuggling
soap
sobriety
soccer
social norms
Social Security
sociopaths
Socrates
soft drinks
solid
solidarity
solipsism
solos
Solvang
some guy
Sona Panos
songs
Sons of McBitches
Sophocles
Søren Fucking Kierkegaard
sororities
sorry
souls
soundtracks
soup
space
Space Invaders
spackle
spaghetti
spam
Spanish
Special Guest Shot
specialness
specifics
Speed Racer
spelling
spiders
spin
spirituality
Spit In The Face
Split Enz
spoilage
spontaneity
spores
sports
Spring
Stabbed In The Arm
Stabbed In The Chest
Stabbed In The Leg
stagefright
stains
Stalin
stalker
stamps
stances
standards
Star Trek
Star Wars
stardom
stars
State mottos
states
stationery
statistics
status
steak
Stealing Car
Stepfather
Stephen Colbert
Stephen Hawking
Stephen King
Steve Buscemi
Steve Young
Steven Seagal
Steven Tyler
Stevie Wonder
stigma
stilts
stimulus
Sting
storms
stout
straight
strangers
Strangulation
strategy
straw
stridency
struth
strychnine
stuff
stupidity
style
subconscious
subjectivity
submarines
submissiveness
substance
subversiveness
success
succinctness
suck
suffering
sugar
suicide
summer
sun
Sunday
sunset
Super Bowl
superciliousness
superheroes
Superman
superstition
supplements
supposition
surfing
surprise
surrealism
Surveillance
survival
sushi
suspects
suspicion
sweat
Sweden
sweet potato fries
sweetness
Swell Season
swords
syllogism
Sylvia Plath
sympathy
symptoms
t-shirts
Taco Bell
Taken
talent
Talkin' Sweet
tan lines
Tape Recorder
Tarantino
tardiness
TARDIS
taste
Tattoo
tattoos
taunts
taxes
taxicabs
tea
teamwork
technology
Teddy Roosevelt
Teddy Thompson
teeth
Tegan
telepathy
temptation
Tennessee Williams
terrible
terrorism
Terry Ballard
tests
text-messaging
Th Dudes
Thai food
Thanksgiving
the Amish
The Avengers
the Axis Powers
The Bangles
the barter system
The Beatles
The Beloved
the Bessemer Process
the Bible
the Blob
the blog
the Blues
the blug
the bottle4
the British Antilles
the Brunching Shuttlecocks
the buddy system
The Bullet Standard
the Civil War
The Coen Brothers
The Crane
The Crepe Place
the cross
The Crow
The Cure
The Departed
The Eagles
The Edge
the English
the Fillmore
The French
the future
The Godfather
The Grand Duke of Luxembourg
the Horse King
the id
the internet
the law
The Living End
The Mach 5
the Matrix
the mind
the moon
the nasty
the obvious
The Olympics
the Other
The Outer Limit
The Pope
The Positive Thought Process
the possible
the pussy
the Qur'an
the Renaissance
The Scientificus
The Seldom Scene
The Shadow
the sky
the solar system
The Supreme Court
The The
the Titanic
The Trick
the UN
the universe
The US Army
The US Navy
The USMC
the West
the World Series
The X-Files
the zoo
theater
theft
themes
theology
theories
there should be
theremin
They Might Be Giants
They Say
thievery
this guy
Thomas Merton
Thompson Twins
Thor
thorns
thoughts
threats
Thriller
throw
Thrown Off Balcony
Thucydides
thumbs
tidal waves
Tied To Bedpost
Tied To Chair
tigers
Tim Finn
Tim McGraw
time
time travel
Tina Fey
tins
tips
tirades
tires
TMI
today
toes
toilets
tolerance
Tolkein
Tolkien
Tom Cruise
Tom Petty
Tom Sawyer
Tom Swifties
Tom Waits
tomatoes
tombstones
tone
tools
Top 9
Top H List
torpedos
Torture
Tortured To Death
totally fake
tough guy
tough topics
tourism
tow-trucks
towels
toxicity
toys
tradition
traffic
traffic lights
tragedy
trains
Trainspotting
Translation
Trapped In Elevator
trash-talking
trees
trials
tribe
tribulations
tricks
triumph
troubles
Troy Aikman
Tru-Coat
trucks
truisms
trust
truth
tsatsiki
Tuesday
tugboats
tuna
Tunisia
turkey
turtles
tv
Twain
Twilight Zone
twins
twitch
Twitter
typos
tyranny
tzatziki
U2
UFOs
Uh
ukulele
umlaut
Uncanny Valley effect
Uncle Tim
undefeated
undergarments
underground
understanding
unicorns
unions
uniqueness
unity
unrest
up
updates
upheavals
uplift
upside-down globes
Usher
vacuum
Valentine
validation
vambraces
vampires
Van Halen
vanity
vans
vegetables
vemdettas
verbatim
Vetiver
vicissitudes
victory
videos
Vietnam
vigilantes
vindication
violence
virginity
virtue
virtuoso
viruses
vodka
voicemail
Vonnegut
Wachowskis
wackos
waffles
Wallace Shawn
walls
Wally Lamb
wanderer
war
warmth
warnings
Warren Zevon
wars
watching
water
waterboarding
Waterworld
way hetero
weaklings
weakness
weather
weekend
Weezer
weight
weird
Westerns
what ifs
whimsy
whining
whisky
whispers
whistleblowing
White House
whiteness
whites
whores
wickedness
widows
wifefucking
wikipedia
Wilco
will
Will Ferrell
William of Ockham
William S. Burroughs
William Shatner
wine
wings
winners
winning
winter
wisdom
wishes
wit
Wolverine
women
wonder
Wonder Woman
word of the day
wordhood
wordplay
words
work
worlds
worms
worry
wrestling
writers par excellence
writing
wrong
wrongness
wtf
X-Men
Yacht
yay
yelling
yo
yogurt
Yosemite
you
you know
You-Tube
Young Fresh Fellows
youth
youth culture
zen
Zero Wing
zombies
Zooey Deschanel
Zoroastrianism

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